How To Be a Gangsta.

Clearly, throughout my whole life i've tried to be a little more gangsta, a little mo' thug - get my 2pac ON. Recently, i've been feelin' like i'm on the brink of raisin' my O.G. status to unknown heights, about to make some new gangsta-gangsta fraaaandz, feelin' like i'm finally be gettin' my thuuuug on. 

Here's how it's done....

See, what i'm gunna do first, is be from a small town, with no urban area, whatsoever.
 
"Projects? Like, the ones you do in school?"
No, fool, the housing systems.

Then, i'm going to study my gansta ass off, watchin' music videos, and do what these TV gangsta's be derrrn.

"Yo dawwwwwg, pink is the new G shit. You see dat new Camron joint? Let's go see what pink shirts ya mamzz got."

And only THEN, will I go buy my first pair of URR FORCES and completely misunderstand the POINT OF THE SHOE GAME... hold up, this shit bothers me, so lemme explain...

SHOES:
If you're gunna buy a pair of fresh white shoes. The intention, is to keep them white, if you're on foot patrol, walkin' all damn day, in your fresh whites, then you're retarded, because THEN, you're gunna go try and stunt ( only learning that word on UrbanDictionary.com ) with some gnarly scuffed up, raggedy ass lookin' ( what once were...) whites... Off white with some mud on the side is not gangsta. 

Anyway...

AFTER THAT, i'ma find me a group of people who be feelin' the gangsta in their veins, too. ( There's a profound difference in being uneducated, and being urban or being a gaaangsta. Mmmk.? ) Because see, evidently, from watching this fuckery in my area, these people feel more comfortable in their fuckery, if they have a group of other ingrates who do that same fraudulent shit WITH them.... idiots.... THEN, i'm a find me a yelllla-bone ( and not know what that means ) and WIFE HER UP.... ( Oh God, here I go... )

If you meet a girl who is proud of their hoodrat, 'let's go to jail and be away from my kids for social status,' types? The 'im up in the club 4 nights a week, with babies at home,' types, the 'yeah, i fucked ALL your homies, but I really love you,' types, the 'I don't need a edge-a-ma-kay-shun, i'ma just strip cuz I gotta nice bawwwwdy,' types? RUN. But ONLY if you're trying to be a gangsta, those the types of broads you're gunna need. AND ONLY THEN, what you're gunna need to do, is take the 3 $20 bills you and your homies collectively "hustle & grinded," for, and you need to turn two of them into ones, and put one twenty on the outside, and put it in a "rubber band," because "Yo, mah manz, I saw that shit on T.I's new shit," - take some pictures with your, "ride or dieeeee," peoples, and PUT THAT SHIT ON FACEBOOK..

Because THAT'S GANGSTA...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.....

This shit has bothered me since I moved here. Bothered me and also, been a source of comedy. Ain't shit cute about how oblivious people are to just how big of a DOUCHE BAG this shit makes them look. Hey, have fun runnin' your hood and "knuckin' if you buck." LOL. 

Point Made. Nuff Said.