In the meantime....

So, I always have this little, "thinking session," before I go to sleep. Ah, i'm full of shit, it's never, "little," it's that, "whyyyy am I still thinking about this shit," kinda situation, lol. Anyway, being as there is no switch to shut my mind up, or duct tape to do the trick. I gotta put it somewhere. In fact, this blog ( and past blogs/journals )  has been a revelation to me, well, one revelation after another. I strongly suggest everyone try it, at least once. Privately, or publicly. 

Let's get down on some random musings....

- I've missed out on A LOT of good things in my life. Both good things, and good people. Either by shutting people out, or just being so consumed with insane amounts of bullshit that my focus was so clouded, that I didn't even realize how much life was passing me by. It's never a "feel good," thing to know you literally, watched good things pass. "The beauty of hindsight," right? Ugh. In recent months i've put a lot of focus into the good in my life, and i'm happy to say that i've progressed greatly in that part of my life. Being aware, is something I generally always am. But, there's a difference in being aware of certain chosen things/people, instead of the entire sha-bang. I won't twist that up ever again in this life, I refuse to. I planned on practicing what I preach, long ago and i've been doin' that. So, go me. But, damn - i'm faced with 1 of 2 choices - I can be pissed and salty about what i've missed out on, or I can be elated that my awareness is so on point, that I can see clearrrrly nowwww the raaaain is gone. ( breaking into song is my thing, don't you judge me, lol. ) 

Anyway, I just got lethargic on this blog, lol. Which I find this frequent lethargicness to be utter shit, lol. 

In the meantime, be fearless, fools!

- Courtney.